Archive for the ‘Redoes’ Category

Remakes And Sequels And Remade Sequels: Let The Madness Continue

May 27, 2009


So browsing for movie news today really enlightened me. Apparently Hollywood is making a LOT of remakes, sequels, and reboots. That’s so weird, I hadn’t noticed. I just went through three weeks of sequel blockbusters, maybe I should have picked up on the trend?

Seriously, where did this start? I’ve commented on it a few times, but what instigated this incessant need for recycling old material? Not that I don’t enjoy sequels and remakes, some are great, but I would like to see more original thought. Too often a sequel is only made for monetary purposes and is only a complete rehash of the first. What happened to original sequels, told for the sake of a good story? Remember Die Hard? Die Hard 2 was completely different. They were in an airport that time…

I think, sadly, comic book movies are to blame. I don’t want to accuse them, because I enjoy most of the so damn much, but there has been a negative effect on originality due to their popularity. For one, comic book movies are made to be serials. Not only that, but many of them were reboots or sequels from older movies, thus started a ‘dig up the old’ trend. When comic-book franchises became the big thing, studios stated looking for any franchise, and voila, we have remakes and reboots into modern franchises. Oh, and sequels galore. Movie-goers are now sequel obsessed. Hollywood’s most original thought today is to make board game movies. And one about Bazooka gum… Does that count as originality? In some ways, perhaps, but it just seems like some idiot trying to adapt anything into a movie. It’s original in that it has rarely been done (Clue was made a while back), but what they must not realize is this: it’s also a terrible idea. Can’t we do better? I guess we should specify: we want good originality. It’s original to walk around and lick strangers pupils as an introduction. Few people would label that as acceptable, and those that do… well, they’re probably pretty original themselves.

Most recently in this retread world, we have news of a few possibilities.

Anchorman 2: apparently Will Ferrel has said the leading guys from the first movie are meeting next week to discuss a possible sequel. Now, Paul Rudd and Stevel Carrel have gained significant star power since Anchorman, so it’s not certain this will happen, but all the cast members and Adam McKay have expressed interest. There’s talk of setting it in the 80s this time, and I read at slashfilm they even mentioned (gulp) the moon… I would be more excited about seeing the 80s, I’m a little wary about seeing them on the moon. Airplane 2, anyone?

I loved Anchorman and I’d hate to see them ‘Caddyshack 2‘ its good name. But that cast is so funny, I find it hard to think they’ll make a bad movie.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I’ve learned something during my parade on the internet, through various TV and movie and comic-book message boards or blogs: Buffy fans are loyal and rabid. Some site had a contest about a year ago to decide who the best comic-book character was, where people voted and the winners moved through a tournament bracket. I naturally pushed the Man Of Steel through, and thought he’d come to face the likes of Batman, Spider-Man, Wolverine, hell, even Aquaman. I was surprised to see the final showdown was between Superman and Buffy. Then Buffy fans teamed up, and sat at their computers to vote multiple times, so that not only did she win but she gathered more votes than China’s population.

Alright, so that’s an exaggeration, but it did tell me one thing: Buffy fans are cheaters. Devoted cheaters, perhaps. But still cheaters. They must just wait for some contest like this to pop up so they can manipulate their way through the system to win. Ask anyone on the street, you’ll find very few Buffy votes. But, this shows the blond vampire slayer has an obvious fan-base, as well as a cult movie and successful TV series under her belt. So what do we do? We reboot her of course. Expect to see it soon, where I will go in Superman costume and smack all those little bitches that ruined the poll.

Tomb Raider: Remember a while back, I posted five video-games that should be made into movies? You know what wasn’t on that list? Pac-man and Tomb Raider.

But that’s what’s goin’ down now. They’re rebooting the series, so forget whatever you remember starring Angelina Jolie. Apparently, the six years its been since the last movie is enough for movie execs to say, “You know what? I think we’re ready for a new one.” It’s going to be a character driven origin story starring a younger Lara Croft. Megan Fox’s name has been mentioned, but I think fanboys would start that rumor if there were a movie about Mother Teresa’s teenage years. “Teenage female? Oh, Megan Fox is available. Yeah, who knew Teresa was a sex-bomb.”

Great… A third Tomb Raider movie. There are better things to do with your time and money, damn it! Plus I still want to see a Legend of Zelda movie…

Oh well.